Our Guest Bloger today is Kelly Miller. Kelly's specialty as a counselor is helping parents who are having to deal with teenage alcohol and drug abuse.

RELAPSE AMONG TEENAGERS

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My Son Is Still Writing His Story.

Sometimes at a meeting words are uttered that are so simple and yet so profound that I leave the meeting going deeper into myself. That happened recently when a woman spoke about her  own codependency, and how it had trained her to focus on her son instead of herself. 

First, she made everybody laugh when she told us about how easy it was for her son, who was her "qualifier," to CON HER. She said;

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If I Use Will My Kids Use Too? YES.

Important disclaimer; if you are reading this and you or someone you love has addiction or codependency it may cause you to feel shame and guilt. God knows there is too much of these two culprits around us already, especially as parents. Please read this in the spirit that it was writen. "Learn the facts about alcoholism" is one of the "Do's and Dont's" that are read outloud at almost every Al-Anon meeting. The following is written in that spirit.

Ken

The following is taken from Teens Under The Influence,  c 2003 by Katherine Ketcham and Nicholas A. Pace, MD.

"The conscience of children is formed by the influences that surround them; their notions of good and evil are the result of the moral atmosphere they breathe."

                                                                                                                                                                RICHTER

Children who grow up with parents who use alcohol and other drugs are  at a greater risk for drug use and addiction for the following basic reasons:

1. Heredity: Children may inherit their parents' genetic predisposition to alcohol and other drug addictions.

2. Exposure: Children whose parents use drugs are more likely to be exposed to drugs and drug users than children whose parents abstain from using drugs. Children also tend to adopt their parents' attitudes towards drugs. If drugs are part of their everyday life, they may begin to view drugs as "normal."

3.  Stress. When parents regularly use alcohol and/or other drugs, the child's home life is more likely to be stressful and chaotic.  If one or more parents are addicted to drugs, stress levels are bound to be high and the risk of physical,  sexual, and emotional abuse increases dramatically.

4.  Lack of discipline. Because people who are dependent on drugs spend a relatively large percentage of their time either high or preoccupied with getting high, they will have less time to spend with their children. Drugs profoundly affect the brain, impairing the parents' ability to reason and react in a reasonable way, control impulses, remember important dates and responsibilities, and keep emotions under control. 

Adolescents whose parents are addicted to drugs have one additional risk factor-any attempt they make themselves to stop using drugs may be derailed by their parents or other drug-using family members, including brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents.

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I know that the above points will not stop any alcoholic or addict from using. I included this information in my blog for the children who are being influenced, and so that those who have somehow dodged the bullet and stopped using may have some insight into how this happened to them in the beginning.

Sure, there are literally thousands of places and programs available for the alcoholics and addicts, but I am focusing here on the four reasonably functioning enablers who are required to take up the slack and "cover" for each of those alcoholics and addicts. If you are one of those unlucky four, there is help for you too. Help for the enablers is not as well known, not as readily available, and not as "glamorous," but nevertheless it is available right in your community and it is free!

Call Nar-Anon or Al-Anon today and find a meeting where there is support for you. Al-Anon is at 1-800-4-Al-ANON or visit their web site at www. al-anon.alateen.org.



God Bless Us All. 

Ken P., one author of the new book We Codependent Men-We Mute Coyotes  

copyright 2011, Recovery Trade Publications

I had a great opportunity to go tour and observe Life-Line's recovery center. I got to meet with many of the staff and even the director of admissions. I got to see first hand what it is Life-Line does and what they stand for. I will write what I have observed from my visit. I really like what Life-Line stands for so I will use most of this first page to tell about Life-Line itself and what they do differently! I was not paid to write this review I wrote it in hopes to help struggling parents find help for their kids!

Let me first explain a little about Life-Line. They are a recovery center to help teens who have fallen into bad habits such as substance abuse, sexual abuse, pornography addiction, suicidal tendencies, grief and loss, and many more. They follow a simple yet powerful slogan, “When Good Kids Make Bad Choices.” Their program includes eight core principles, based on evidence based research, which are:

• Family - family is involved in the child's recovery every step of the way

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